The selected tweets of Dave Nold.

Quiet, I’m trying to blog here.

The oldest member of the new breed

Please, my friends call me Dave.

Just click and create.

This American Life on Mars.

Use your small print voice.

Two working titles for movies: “When Logos Collide” and/or “Where Bald Men Sit”.

Someone is playing “Discreet Music” really loud.

Among the things I wish I said in 1983: “MTV is an invention without a future”

I asked Bobby Dylan. I asked the Beatles. I asked Neil Sedaka, but he couldn’t tell me either.

You auto complete me

I gotta force quit you Baby

Don’t have any ideas for new products but when I think of one I’ll call it “You Like This”

Tapes get eaten, hard drives fail, cards get corrupted and then you die.

Sitting on the couch waiting for the next Nick Lowe album to be released.

metric nuts

remember acid jazz?

Enable the module and enjoy!

Columbus was a prick.

don’t forget to stop and smell the rock formations

Overheard in Lovelock: “nobody’s normal no more”

Stuck in Folsom Prism.

High class barflies

“Coastal residents won’t see the sun today.” That just means it’s gonna be cloudy, right?

Now look what you made me do.

It’s time to take back the phrase “It’s time to take back the”

the shingle you seek is always in the bundle before you

dream genres

Stop thanking me in advance you presumptuous bastards

door to door wikipedia salesman

dreamt altruism was a trending topic

more fun than a barrel of junkies

I hate it when there’s a typo in my horoscope. How can I take it seriously?

Dear Database Member,

Happy Birthday Susan! And happy anniversary of the Kennedy assassination to everyone else.

Objects are smarter than they appear.

Think I might Wang Chung tonight.

Best spam name of the day: Alvin Boone

Feeling thematic

If I had a nickel for every time I said “‘Ere thrice the sun done salutation to the dawn”

everything I learned in life I learned in 1982

are you sure you want to eject dave?

smoke ’em if you got ’em

keep it snarky people

Hide me from all widgets.

i saw bin laden and elvis at denny’s this morning

Where you been all your life?

Past tense of sync: sunk

Republicans are boring

I think I’m in a meeting.

capitalists are assholes

Nothing to undo

Thinking of going to Hollywood to write one of those spectaculars.

“Aol trying to recapture that startup feeling”. Aren’t we all …

busy talking to wall

As a matter of fact I was born in a barn. Why do you ask?

Let them watch cake.

unsafe on any speed

There’s a hole in the blogosphere

Jesus prefers the more modern stuff

7 is the new 6 … in dog years

Dude, your symbolism is whack

Wait…I’m having a thought.

tagless and bible black

Phrase of the day: Minor Masterpiece.

Again our hero is drawn away from the edit suite. Did the Vicar jump or was he pushed?

that cloud has sailed

Stop the world, I want to to get back on.

let the machine get it

The Lord is known by many email addresses. You shall know him when he Twittereth unto you.

Annoying phrase of the day: ‘variable skill set’

going to try thinking INSIDE the box for a change.

amateur auteur

a riddle wrapped in light flakey crust

The Chilblains. A nineties brit-pop band, or the pain I’m experiencing in my toes?

So now what?

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Updated 3.20.15:

You gotta break a few egos to make a soufflé of ideas.

Anyone’s life could be a movie. It just takes a good editor.

I was raised Irish Catholic with a minor in Sarcasm.

Instant amateur psychoanalysis.

There’s a limit to what I can pull out of my ass.

New project: takeoff on that Foxworthy redneck guy. “You might be an asshole if…”

I’ll have someone else write the jokes. I’m an idea man. Like Eno.

Wait. It’s only Thursday?

“Today is a good day to change my password” – Worf

“Undo drag”. If only.

Bumper sticker idea: “I’d rather be drinking and smoking”

Follow your cynicism

“Clouds in my coffee” – the poetic genius of Carly Simon

Denial is an invaluable tool. Under rated, and in my opinion, misunderstood.

“Where are my missile launchers?” If I had a nickel for every time I said that. #CovertAffairs

I was just polishing the apples on my apple tree. That’s normal right?

I’m wimpy but fair.

Finished “The Borgias” last night. Favorite line in the series: “There goes the Botticelli”.

I’m like Ralph Kramden without a steady job.

The Mind escapes me.

What was invented first – stairs or the wheel?

Tap to snooze

If it’s urgent it must be junk